How To Have an Anal Orgasm: A Step-by-Step Guide

Did you know you can have an orgasm just from anal stimulation? We believe that orgasms shouldn’t be something you luck into — everyone deserves to get off regularly

If exploring your body through anal play is something you’re interested in, we’ve got everything you need to know. After all, learning what works for you should be an exciting journey and not a chore!

What Is an Anal Orgasm?

Many people aren’t aware that you can have an orgasm from anal stimulation alone. What makes this possible is the abundant nerve endings present in and around the anus. 

The external anal sphincter (the part of the anus closest to the outside of the body) actually has one of the densest concentrations of nerve endings in the entire body. These nerve endings mean that you are likely to experience an anal orgasm from external stimulation as you do deep anal penetration (read: rimming). Let’s dig deeper.

Anal orgasms in penis-owners:

The prostate – aka the P-spot – can be stimulated in a number of ways. Surrounded by thousands of nerve endings that feel very good when stimulated. In fact, some people can ejaculate from prostate stimulation alone. 

Anal orgasms in people with a vulva: 

Stimulating the sensitive nerves around the anus, including the pudendal nerve, is why rimming can feel so good. Another way to anal orgasm involves stimulating parts of the internal clitoris through the anus. The G-spot (on the front wall of the vagina) and A-spot (also on the front wall but closer to the cervix) are both reachable through anal penetration.

We recommend blending anal play and external clitoral stimulation for a mind-blowing experience.

What Does It Feel Like?

Describing what an anal orgasm feels like is difficult because everyone experiences them uniquely. We’ve seen people call them “powerful,” “pulsating,” “explosive,” and even “mind-blowing.” 

It’s fair to say that anal orgasms may be one of the most intense, full-body orgasms you’ve ever experienced — which seems like a good reason to try it for yourself!

If You’re the Receiving Partner

Even if you aren’t a regular bottom, taking a turn as the receiving partner can be intense and exciting. Here are some of our favorite tips for making your experience as fun and pleasurable as possible. 

Engage in Foreplay

Sex is about all of your erogenous zones, so take your time exploring them, and you’ll be ready to blow in no time. 

Stimulate your clitoris (if you have one), perform and receive oral sex, play with yourself — whatever gets you in the mood!

The more turned on you are before anal play, the more enjoyable it will be (and the more likely you’ll reach anal orgasm).

Take a Warm Bath To Loosen Tight Muscles

A warm bath to help relax tight muscles is a well-known method for anal play. It also offers a double benefit — helping to loosen up a tight anal sphincter while also preparing your anus.

You can even use a warm bath as foreplay with our Intimacy Bath Salts, which can relax your muscles, ease tension, and get you in the mood for what’s to come next.

Grab a Butt Plug

Butt plugs are misunderstood sex toys when it comes to anal play, but it doesn’t have to be. They’re the perfect way to help you experience what anal play feels like on your own. Plus, you can use them when having sex with a partner or two. Just remember to take it slow and add plenty of toy-friendly lube.

If You’re the Giving Partner

If you’re the giving partner and are searching for ways to help your partner have an anal orgasm — high five! It’s easy to be selfish in sexual situations, but taking the time to make it a mutually pleasurable experience is so much more fun. 

Groom Your Hands

As we said, foreplay is a mandatory part of helping your partner reach anal orgasm. Before the clothes come off, take a few minutes to trim and file your fingernails and wash your hands. You’ll reduce the risk of potential tearing and infection for you and your partner.

Use a Condom

Condoms are crucial (along with regular STI testing), especially if you’re having anal sex outside of a monogamous relationship. However, they aren’t just for people with a penis! You can also use condoms on your sex toys for easier clean-up.

Embrace the Mood

Setting a positive, sensual vibe with your partner can make you feel more comfortable and make anal play far more pleasurable. Don’t forget to light some candles, put on some music, and enjoy the moment.

If You Have a Vagina

The A-spot (or anterior fornix) is one of the most exciting parts of anal play for cisgender women and AFAB (assigned female at birth) people. It is located at the very “back” of the vagina, which is deeper than the G-spot. Thus, it can only be stimulated with full penetration. However, when the A-spot is reached, it can get your juices flowing.

People with vaginas also benefit from how the pudendal nerve connects to the clitoris. Although everyone has a pudendal nerve, the connection in AFAB people helps support the pelvic floor and leads to more earth-shattering orgasms. 

Combining anal and vaginal/clitoral stimulation can also lead to the elusive “squirt” orgasm (also known as female ejaculation). 

If You Have a Penis

Cisgender men and AMAB (assigned male at birth) people have an anatomical advantage, too. Anal orgasms can be extra mind-blowing for these people because of prostate involvement (also known as P-spot stimulation). 

You can find this walnut-sized magic button about two inches inside the anus, but it can also be stimulated externally through the perineum if you’re not ready for penetration. 

How To Have an Anal Orgasm

Enough talk — let’s dive into how you can experience an anal orgasm for yourself.

Step 1: Communicate

Communication is the key to any successful, mutually pleasurable sexual experience. Anal play requires even more communication, starting before the encounter has even begun. It’s crucial to get consent and discuss boundaries with your partner to know what to expect. 

For example, are you okay with external stimulation but uncomfortable with penetration? Has double penetration been something you’ve always wanted to try? Take the time to have an open, honest discussion with your partner.

While it may be awkward at first, it’ll lead to a deeper level of connection (and even more mind-blowing sex). 

After all, good communication is just sexy, and it sets the vibe for a fulfilling experience.

Step 2: Relax

Have you ever had something scary happen and instinctively clenched your butt? That happens because your anal sphincter naturally reacts to your body’s stress management system. 

If you’re not feeling relaxed and at ease, it’s more likely that you’ll be tight and have discomfort during anal play. If you’re feeling tense, take a second to evaluate why. You may not be as comfortable with anal as you think, which is ok! It’s not for everyone, and it’s ok to say that. 

Again, communication is crucial.

If you’re mentally good to go but know relaxation is an issue for you, we recommend trying our CBD Intimacy Melts. These small, easy-to-insert suppositories are designed for vaginal and anal use. The melts can help ease discomfort and promote greater relaxation, leading to a more pleasurable sexual experience. 

Step 3: Start Small by Using a Finger or a Sex Toy

You don’t have to go from zero to 100 the first time you play. Start with a finger inserted into the anus, or try a perineum massage. You can even break out the sex toys during solo masturbation to get a better feel for what works for your body before working up to more with your partner. 

Step 4: Use the Right Kind of Lube

We know this is our specialty, but using lubrication is absolutely make-or-break for reaching anal orgasm. The anus does not self-lubricate, so you have to use lube to reduce friction and make your experience comfortable. Dry anal play also puts you more at risk for tearing, increasing the risk of contracting an STI.

Our Sex Oil is a great anal play option that all bodies can enjoy. The lube provides long-lasting sensual glide for all types of sex. However, oil-based lubes aren’t always condom-friendly, so check your labels.

Step 5: Combine Anal Stimulation With Other Play

Anal stimulation doesn’t have to happen in isolation; you can combine it with other types of play, too! The classic 69 is the perfect example of this!

Step 6: Grab a Toy

We love toys. We’ve already talked about the benefits of butt plugs, but bringing other toys into the bedroom can also make sex hotter. Try incorporating a dildo, vibrator, strap-on, or anal beads into your playtime (with consent, of course). 

Don’t Stress About the Mess

There will be at least a little mess, no matter how much cleaning and prep you do before anal play. You can also try: 

  • Wearing a condom with plenty of water-based lube to avoid friction
  • Wiping down the outside of your booty before anal play
  • Starting with a lubed finger or sex toy 
  • Avoiding caffeine or coffee 
  • Avoiding laxatives
  • Eating plenty of fiber to make sure you’re going to the bathroom regularly beforehand

After you’re all done, simply wash your hands and any sex toys you’ve used with warm, soapy water. 


Whether it’s your first time with anal play or you’re looking for ways to spice up your already exciting sex life, don’t be afraid to try a bit of backdoor lovin’. 

With our sex-positive tips, a healthy dose of communication, and the right resources, you’ll be on your way to reaching anal orgasms in no time. Have fun, and be safe!


Anatomy, Abdomen and Pelvis, Pudendal Nerve | PubMed

Anxious and Avoidant Attachment, Vibrator Use, Anal Sex, and Impaired Vaginal Orgasm | ScienceDirect

Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) | WHO

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