Congratulations. If you’re reading this, there’s a high chance that you’ve successfully raised a child that not only grew up to become a fully functional adult, but even has their own place of residence!
While holidays can be a chaotic time for everyone — and maybe doubly so if you’re staying at your adult kids’ house — it can also be a surprisingly great time to reconnect intimately with your partner.
And before you say, “Whoah, whoah, whoah, it’s totally innapropriate for me to have sex under my child’s roof.” First off, what’s so scandalous about a grown adult having sex with their partner? And second off, if you think your kid has never had sex under your roof in the past, we might have news for you…
Here are all the reasons we think you should totally have sex at your adult kid’s house this holiday season.
1. Sensual Stress Relief
While the holidays are a magical time of year, they can also be magically stressful, and there’s no better (or more fun) stress relief than sex.
Sure, you could do a meditation or take a walk in the cold to clear your head, but we think staying inside by the fire and having an orgasm or two sounds way better.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed with all the family time (or perhaps an uncomfy conversation about politics with your son in-law), sex can help release some of that negative energy. During sex, the body releases endorphins, which help limit stress and discomfort and boost well-being. Endorphins are the same neurotransmitters released when we move our body during other forms of physical activity and are responsible for the aptly named “runner’s high,” known to send pleasure signals all through the brain.
The good news is, you don’t need to like running to experience this rush of feel-good chemicals to the brain. Sex, and even massages, play a similar role in releasing stress and tension while promoting calm and relaxation.
If you’re still not totally comfortable with the idea of having sex at your kid’s house, you can have a PG massage. Just pack our Massage Oil to make sure you have the best experience (and so you don’t leave a sticky mess on their sheets).
If you’re looking to get your blood flowing and your endorphins pumping in the bedroom, pack our Awaken Arousal Oil in your carry-on to help boost pleasure and sensation. Intense, energy-releasing orgasms await you.
Plus, when you release your stress, you’ll show up as a more grounded, patient, and joyful parent (or grandparent) — and that’ll make everyone else happy, too.
2. It’s Like Hotel Room Sex, Just Different
Here at Foria, we swear by the magic of hotel room sex, and we’re not alone. Something about being out of the house, away from any chores, routines, and to-dos, helps us stay present, grounded in our bodies, and — for lack of better word — just plain horny.
This temporary mental reset and relaxation can be applied to your kid’s house too. Sure, it’s not a swanky hotel, and there may not be fluffy robes or slippers, but it’s still not your house. And therefore, you’re not responsible for cleaning up after dinner or locking up the house at night.
With fewer responsibilities, it can be way easier to drop into your body and connect with your partner on an intimate level (or in general). Take advantage of this “hotel room” phenomenon, but without the pricey stay or cramped quarters. You might be surprised how great the sex can be in your adult kid’s guest room!
3. It Models Healthy, Happy Relationships for Your Adult Kids
It’s never too late to give your kid a little sex ed. You might have had the “birds and the bees” talk with them way back when, but sex ed shouldn’t stop at safe sex. Adult children (and everyone, to be honest) can seriously benefit from seeing (and sensing) that long-term relationships can be loving and alive far after the honeymoon phase. “If the only sex ed they had was porn, you can still help properly educate them,” explains Sacha Fossa, MA. Sex, intimacy, relationship and wellness coach, educator and healing arts practitioner.
This doesn’t mean that they need the details of your sex life. Just feeling the vibe of parents who enjoy each other, and perhaps exhibit some G-rated intimacy around family (like holding hands), can work wonders to normalize desire, connection, and lifelong pleasure for the next generation.
“So many of my clients report that they are unwilling to have sex when their kids are in the house, " says Fossa. “It becomes an excuse for there being no adult sexual connection which just leads to misery generally. As parents, model a healthy sex life. You really would not want your kids to have unhealthy or non-existent sex lives, correct?”
4. It Strengthens Your Relationship Amid Holiday Chaos
Have you ever spent an entire weekend with family, only to feel like you didn’t actually connect with anyone the entire time? Unfortunately, this can sometimes happen with group dynamics, and with family in particular.
If you’re so caught up in spending time with family that you don’t see as often as your partner, sex can be a great way to reconnect with your partner at the end of a busy day with family.
“When your kids are finally grown, the holidays become a second chance to savor the intimacy you were far too exhausted to enjoy when they were little,” explains Josefina Bashout, Tantric Sex & Intimacy Expert.
You spend so much time during the holidays pouring your energy into family, cooking, logistics, and emotional labor. Intimacy is a great way to pour back into your partner and your relationship, and sex specifically can be a great grounding ritual to remind you both that you’re a team during hectic holiday gatherings. Think of sex like a team huddle.
5. The Thrill of Doing Something Slightly Naughty
Nothing spices up your sex life like doing something new or taboo.
“If Santa really kept a naughty list for grown ups, holiday sex at your kids' house would absolutely put you on it and that is exactly why I invite you to do it,” says Bashout. “It is the spark that created this entire family in the first place and yes, that fire is still very much alive, pulsing, and ready for action.”
The combination of the thrill of having sex at your kid’s house, plus the novelty of getting intimate somewhere new, can seriously ignite the spark.
“Research shows that trying something new together isn’t just fun, it literally brings the spark back,” explains Marissa Nelson, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist. “A study from the State University of New York at Stony Brook found that couples who engaged in novel, exciting activities experienced nearly a 20% boost in relationship satisfaction in just 10 weeks. Novelty activates the same reward pathways that power early attraction, which means a little holiday mischief in your kids’ guest room may be scientifically good for your marriage.”
Of course, having sex at your kid’s house isn’t actually that bad. If it was, we wouldn’t be urging you to do it.
“Having sex in your adult child's home is not about being scandalous or profane,” says Bashout. “It’s more about letting pleasure melt the pressure of the season so you can enjoy that family quality time from a deeper place of joy. Nothing brings more holiday cheer than parents who reemerge from the guest room looking mysteriously flushed, full of jolly and feeling a lot more generous.”
Think of this as a win-win. Your sex life gets a spicy twist, and your kids get to deal with you in your best, post-sex mood. If nothing else, think of it as revenge for all the times your kids may or may not have snuck around with a partner under your roof.
How to Have Holiday Sex Respectfully in Your Kids’ Home
Are you finally onboard with our hot take? Great. That being said, there’s still some best practices for having sex when you’re someone’s houseguest. Here are some of our best tips to keep in mind for your holiday quickie.
- Choose appropriate timing: We love an afternoon delight, but to minimize the chances of your daughter-in-law walking in on you, you might want to keep intimate time to early mornings or later evenings when everyone is winding down in their respective rooms and you are less likely to be disturbed.
- Keep it quiet: You don’t need to pretend you’re a virgin, but you also don’t need your family to hear what your orgasm sounds like. Keeping things quiet can add to the thrill of having sex at your kid’s house. Have your partner cover your mouth with their hand, or perhaps use a winter scarf as a makeshift oral restraint.
- Be mindful of shared spaces: If you’re lucky enough to have your own guest room, you should probably reserve all your lovemaking to that area (with the door closed!). If you’re staying in a shared space (like on a pullout couch in the living room), see our point above about choosing appropriate timing.
- Bring discreet sex essentials: There’s a reason our Foria Intimacy formulas are all travel-sized, because we want you to bring them with you on all your out-of-town rendezvous’. “My advice is to pack a travel-friendly pleasure kit,” says Nelson. “I love Foria’s Sex Oil, and their Relief Salve with CBD and Kava is magic for melting stress (and any holiday travel-induced aches) so you can stay ready for action.” Our Intimacy Melts are also great for quickies, because you can insert them before sex to act as pre-foreplay, and the internal lubrication minimizes the chances of mess on a bed that’s not yours.
Give Yourself (and Everyone Else) the Gift of Pleasure
At the end of the day, holiday gatherings are about connection — with family, with tradition, and yes, with your partner. Amid the gift wrapping, travel logistics, political debates at the dinner table, and the beautiful chaos of being under one roof again, your pleasure shouldn’t be the first thing to go. In fact, tending to your intimate connection might just be the secret ingredient that makes the whole season feel softer, sweeter, and a lot more fun.
Having sex at your adult kid’s house isn’t about being disrespectful or trying to relive your rebellious youth. It’s about honoring the relationship that carried you through all those years of parenting. It’s about remembering that you’re still two people who desire, delight, and deserve joy — even (and especially) during the holidays. When you nurture that spark, you show up as your most grounded, generous, and emotionally available self. Trust us: everyone benefits from that.
So go ahead — pack your travel-size pleasure essentials, claim your guest-room oasis, and let yourselves reconnect in the most human, heart-opening way. If Santa did have a naughty list, this is one time we’d wholeheartedly suggest landing on it. ’Tis the season to be a little daring, and a lot more satisfied.
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