We love the idea of a bucket list, but haven’t you ever wondered why people seem to wait so long to check things off of them? While it’s true that most of us don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone, we’d like to encourage you to live your life just a little bit more in the moment.
Don’t wait for the right moment because—spoiler alert—the right moment will never exist. Make a sex bucket list with your partner and start making memories now.
Why Mixing Up Your Sex Life Is a Must
Even in the “perfect” relationship, things can get routine. There are advantages to knowing your partner inside and out, but that can also easily swing the other direction.
If you and your partner know each other too well, especially sexually, you may not branch out and explore different ways of pleasuring each other. Why mess with perfection, right?
Yes, the result may be that you both have an orgasm (hopefully), but are you having fun? If it’s been a while since you remember truly letting go and enjoying your partner, creating a sex bucket list is the perfect way to mix it up. You’ll not only create an even closer bond with your partner, but you might also learn something about yourself.
Erotic Ideas for Your Sex Bucket List
If you’re looking for suggestions like having sex in the shower, trying blindfolds, wearing lingerie, or trying phone sex—this isn’t that article. Chances are, you’ve already tried those things, and honestly? They’re not all that groundbreaking.
We wanted to mix it up, so get ready for our top 10 sex bucket list suggestions to take your sex life up a level (or several — the sky’s the limit, so join that mile-high club).
1. Role Play Your Fantasies
Role-playing in the bedroom is one of the most versatile ways to spice up your sex life, but it’s anything but vanilla. Sure, there are plenty of cliche pairings in the role play world (secretary, anyone?), but no judgment if that’s what gets your motor running.
The best thing about role play is that it allows you to let go and become someone else. If you’ve felt awkward or ashamed of your kinks (although you shouldn’t, we understand how that goes), do them under the guise of a different persona.
Pro tip: Role play as an exotic dancer and practice your lapdance and strip tease skills. The dancers we know are powerful and confident—get in on that vibe.
2. Introduce New Sex Toys
The more advanced technology becomes, the more exciting sex toys get—not that they weren’t already amazing in the first place. We now have sex toys that can learn your patterns to help you reach better orgasms, stimulate specific parts of your anatomy, or even be played with by you and your partner simultaneously!
Sex toys are for everyone, no matter what genitals you may have and how you identify. Don’t be afraid to add a few vibrators and dildos to your sex bucket list ideas and experience something new with your partner.
3. Hot Oil Massage With Arousal Oil and Lube
Life is stressful, so why not treat your partner to a hot oil massage and help them loosen up? Just stick a bottle of Awaken Arousal Oil or Intimacy Sex Oil in a cup of hot (not boiling) water for a few minutes, have your partner take their clothes off, and use the oil to explore every part of their body. Once they’re all lubed up, use that oil in even more creative ways—but don’t rush!
Shibari, the ancient art of Japenese rope bondage, is both beautiful and practical. If you’ve always wanted to learn more about tying your partner up BDSM-style but want it to look beautiful, shibari is the way to go.
While there is a steep learning curve (this is more than just cheap, fuzzy handcuffs, after all), it is well worth the time spent. Step back, relax, and enjoy how beautiful your partner looks before teasing them relentlessly.
5. Mutual Masturbation
If we had to guess, we’d say you can probably get yourself off in under five minutes—but where’s the fun in that? Another item to cross off your bucket list is exploring some mutual masturbation with your partner.
Touch yourself in front of the other person, touch each other simultaneously, or even put on a show! Don’t be shy about a little show and tell—it can only improve your sex life. And feel free to dirty talk along the way. A few moans never hurt anyone.
6. Hot/Cold Play
The body is amazing and can be stimulated in many different ways. After all, we have five different senses, so why not play with them and see what works for you? One of the ways you can incorporate your senses into your sex bucket list is by exploring some kinky temperature play.
Although it may not be new territory, teasing your partner with ice can be an excellent form of foreplay. Tell them that you won’t move on until the ice cube has melted, and then focus on their erogenous zones until they’re begging you for more. Steamy nipple play can even lead to a full nipple orgasm.
But don’t stop with cold objects; try some hot stuff too! Wax or warming gels can be fun to up the sensation, but start small, so you don’t overwhelm your partner. And always have a safe word.
7. Sensory Deprivation
Sure, it’s fun to increase the sensation, but it also works the other way. Before diving in, try sensory deprivation. After all, when you remove one of your senses from the equation, the others become amplified.
Explore it for yourself by blindfolding your partner and having them wear headphones with their favorite sexy playlist while you kiss and touch their entire body. They may experience silent sex, but chances are you’ll be basking in their moans in no time.
8. Anal Play
We’re excited that anal play is becoming universal, but if you haven’t tried it for yourself yet, we highly recommend you add it to your sex bucket list. Just remember to use plenty of lube and go slow, starting with a finger or two before moving up to sex toys or full anal sex (if you want to).
The prostate or p-spot (sometimes referred to as the male g-spot) can produce unique and intense orgasms. Why not explore this mind-blowing sexual experience?
9. Food Play
Food is delicious, but it can also be incredibly sexy in the right situation. Many traditional ways to use food in the bedroom are still hot—whipped cream, chocolate, etc. But don’t be restrained by the classics; up the ante further by using food in more unique ways, too.
You can incorporate anything you or your partner likes—try frozen grapes, champagne, or popsicles for some more of that cold play. Make sure you clean up quickly, especially after using anything with high amounts of sugar in or near the vagina. You don’t want an infection as a parting gift.
10. Everything But Sex, Sex
Just because we call it a sex bucket list doesn’t mean it has to be only about the sex. Sometimes it can be fun to spend a night focusing on other ways to pleasure your partner that don’t include penetration (a bit of oral sex, anyone?).
Take turns going down on each other, dance for your partner, sit on their face—get each other off without relying on simple intercourse and remind each other why you were so sexually attracted to each other in the first place.
In tantric sex, the goal is not penetration but a build-up of sexual energy. If you imagine kama sutra positions, think again. Tantra can be a great study tool for the everything-but-sex sex.
Even if you’ve already checked all 10 things off your sex bucket list, we hope you’re inspired to think out of the box (and yes, pun intended). Ditch the old bucket list with threesomes and strip poker, and think bigger.
Sex should always be fun and exciting, and life is way too short to resign to a mundane sex life. Follow us for more tips and tricks to keep your sex life hot, no matter how long you’ve been with your partner.
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